Americans Abroad
Americans Abroad … Ned Phillips knows a thing or two about living abroad so he decided to share his pearls of ex-pat wisdom. In this month’s E-zine he talks about establishing a life outside of the states and opening the lines of communication in Paris.
One of my favourite books especially on the road is The Beach, by British author Alex Garland. The main character Richard has a line which I feel sums up my experiences abroad quite succinctly. It also resonates with the young, international backpacking crowd that I’ve encountered so far:
“Trust me, it’s paradise. This is where the hungry come to feed. For mine is a generation that circles the globe in search of something we haven’t tried before. So never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite and never outstay the welcome. Just keep your mind open and suck in the experience. And if it hurts, you know what? It’s probably worth it.”
Travelling to new and unknown places is a thrilling prospect. It challenges you, pushes you outside of your comfort zone and forces you to abandon expectation, and preconception.
My first international experience involved my family, scuba diving and the crystal clear Caribbean waters off the coast of Central America. Studying art history, literature and language in Spain was my first taste of living abroad on my own and in retrospect, it was nothing more than an aperitif for the feast that would follow. Today I find myself living in Paris, in a great apartment that’s in a trendy neighbourhood, with a job that allows me to share my passion for travel, with others.
But don’t be misled by the picture I just painted. It wasn’t an easy or a pretty pathway to this point. It tested me and continues to do so on a daily basis. Aside from the logistical challenges involving planes, trains and automobiles, getting a visa, the immunisations, fighting off moray eels and digging through the couch for every bit of cash you can scrounge up, there are the human interactions to deal with too! The language barriers, the cultural differences, the bedroom eyes and even the hostility that at some point you’re bound to come across, as a stranger in a strange land.
Communication is of course key. It’s how we express ourselves, tell others what we want and what we need, how we transfer information, make a joke or offer advice. It’s a daily practice in which we engage so regularly that it becomes second nature. Here’s a challenge for you. Just for a day, make a note of how often and how you communicate with others.
More often than not, it’s not until you’re in front of people that they realise just how much goes into successful communication. Eye contact, hand gestures, body language, word choice, speech rhythm, tone, pronunciation and annunciation all play a part. Now bear that in mind and add a whole different language and you have a small idea of what it’s to eek out a life in Paris.
Knowing a tiny bit of the native tongue always goes a long way. Even a simple greeting to engage someone will pay dividends. It establishes a rapport and makes you feel more comfortable, and at home in your new surroundings.
Simply learning a few words conveys that you’re making an effort to speak the language and become a part of the culture. Simple phrases like the following will form the building blocks of conversation:
“Hello – Bonjour.”
“How are you – Cava”
“How much does it cost? – Combien”
“My God you’re pretty – Mon Dieu, tu est tres belle”
Tune into the exchanges around you and you’ll begin to develop an ear for the cadence and the flow of the language. You’ll learn new vocabulary, pick up bits and pieces, and learn how to respond to certain queries. I’ve found that speaking slowly and making eye contact will establish a personal connection and shows confidence.
Soon enough you’ll be looking out over the water and holding hands with that cutie from the discothèque, your soul aflame with excitement and possibility - wondering why you didn’t hit the road sooner.
- Ned Phillips
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